Isn't artistweekly crappy enough for the entire web? Guess not. I just read this on craigslist:
"Growing publishing company is searching for the best theme song/ music video for their Open Your Heart book series. The song must be original, include the words "open your heart" and reflect the views of the company. Prizes will be awarded for the top three contestants with the grand prize being a customized three state tour of local bookstores, coffee shops and other fun venues. If interested go to www.dreamtimepublishing.com and follow the link to the contest details. "
I am way too busy to check out their website and find out what the "views of the company" are, so I'll post my submission here and assume that their views are probably about half as bad-ass as mine, which will cause them to change said views to be more in line with my views, thus making their views all the more cool. Here's my 1st draft (to the tune of the "Silver Spoons" theme):
Open your heart and feel the blood flow down, feel the cold consume you as your lungs begin to drown. Your eyes final glimpse catches my smile As the color leaves your face and you choke on your bile.
Flute solo
Coda Open your chest, open your heart, Open your chest, open your heart repeat & fade
Dreamtime Publishing contest guidelines:The song must be between thirty (30) and sixty (60) seconds long and be what a reasonable person would consider positive in nature.
Positive in nature my ass. I suspect their guidelines would see "open your chest open your heart" as a mean and disgusting image that could not be tailored to fit the company image.
Myself, I see that line more as...sorta like drive-by heart surgery.
A reasonable person would consider this heart to be a positive experience.
