Lyrics telling a Story

Date: May 11, 2006

Lyrics telling a Story

Date: May 11, 2006

Personally, I have a tough time writing songs that focus solely on imagery. Maybe it's a left-brain right-brain thing, but I don't have the gift. I mean, I can use images in lyrics-- songs sound cold and phoney without them --- but for me it's always to support a story-song. I was listening to Axis: Bold as Love just this morning, and I've always thought that was one of the best examples of a song that stirs emotions purely through imagery. When I try to write like Hendrix I find it almost impossible to detach myself from reality to that extent. I'm too darn cynical. And while I'm on the Jimi topic, would someone please tell me why he isn't known as much for writing as he is for guitar? BTW, Here are the lyrics in case you're not familiar:

Anger he smiles, towering in shiny metallic purple armour
Queen jealousy, envy waits behind him
Her fiery green gown sneers at the grassy ground

Blue are the life-giving waters taken for granted,
They quietly understand
Once happy turquoise armies lay opposite ready,
But wonder why the fight is on

But they’re all bold as love
Just ask the axis

My red is so confident he flashes trophies of war and
Ribbons of euphoria
Orange is young, full of daring,
But very unsteady for the first go round
My yellow in this case is not so mellow
In fact I’m trying to say it’s frigthened like me
And all these emotions of mine keep holding me from, eh,
Giving my life to a rainbow like you

I’m bold as love
Just ask the axis (he knows everything)

Date: May 12, 2006

RE: Lyrics telling a Story vs. Images

mjensen · Member

RE: Lyrics telling a Story

SteveHanlon · Veteran Member

nice reply.'

I remember Pat showing an example of song that shared the same chorus with verses that were not related. and his impression, if I remember right, was that the song was okay but not as strong as it could be.

So he re-wrote the song to have the verses move the "story" along AND give the the listener new glasses to view the chorus.

The song was about violence and each verse was (me making examples here) gang related, country in war related, army forces killing the people of its own country...and the chorus each time just confirmed that 'violence is bad'.

but his 2nd example isolated it to gang warfare...and in each verse you saw the story go along: how it starts in the street - chorus - then it moves into a house as they kill someone - chorus - then it moves along to the next generation of kids and keeps on going - chorus.

My book is packed away or else i'd just copy it out. but it was a very powerful example of how verse can shine different light on a repetitive chorus.

Lastly, about Pat...where are his songs in the world of music? Have we heard any of them on the radio or elsewhere? Just curious to know. he's not a name I'd heard of before I got his book. and he seems more famous as a lyrics teacher than a famous songwriter.

Am I wrong about that? let me know the names of some of his songs if you know any.

Oh and lastly lastly...just was listening to 'The Devil Went down to Georgia' - that is a song to learn from and is a strong story backed up by a hot performance.

-- Edited by SteveHanlon at 10:32, 2006-08-15

mjensen · Member

Yes I believe what you are talking about what Pat calls "re-coloring" the chorus by making each verse make the chorus seems stronger...bring a new light to it. And yes, I think when the verses are all related and yet "re-colored" somehow to keep it interesting, that is the best:) But I guess unrelated verses that still relate to the chorus are better than random images throughout the whole song. To me, a bunch of images just doesn't say anything.

Someone once told me that the best songs make no sense because they are the ones that people have to listen to over and over to try to figure out the lyrics. I couldn't help but laugh. He was a songwriter in his fifties who had been writing songs since he was a teenager but only a few people had heard his songs. And no disrespect to him, but I heard some of them, and I had no desire to listen to them again...I'm sure the songs meant a lot to him, but they were just too personal or "out there" for the general public to relate. I think there are a few (myself included, and they are usually songwriters) who will take the time to listen over and over to a song that doesn't make sense hoping there is some deep meaning hidden underneath all the nonsense. However, for most listeners, unless the music is amazing, they will change the station before the first verse is over. Music is of course the most important part of a song...but a good lyric can grab your attention and stick with you just as easily as a good melody. If you have both, its a double whammy!!

About Pat...haha, I don't know if he has written any famous songs. I wondered that myself. He gave me a few recordings of his songs, and some of them are awesome! However, I don't know if any of them "made it big."

SteveHanlon · Veteran Member

mjensen wrote:

Someone once told me that the best songs make no sense because they are the ones that people have to listen to over and over to try to figure out the lyrics. I couldn't help but laugh. He was a songwriter in his fifties who had been writing songs since he was a teenager but only a few people had heard his songs. And no disrespect to him, but I heard some of them, and I had no desire to listen to them again...I'm sure the songs meant a lot to him, but they were just too personal or "out there" for the general public to relate.

I liked Seal's music when it first hit the scene, but he is one writer where I mostly don't follow the meaning of his lyrics.
And I even read somewhere that he likes his lyrics to be vague enough so others can construe their meanings. Cop out or not? Maybe doesn't matter in the end.

I love his leathery-sounding voice and his arrangements can be quite creative. i remember a song he played in 7/4 and I remember another song he had flute and tabla on and kept changin' up the rhythms in 6/8.

And then there was his popular

Kiss from a Rose

There used to be a greying tower alone on the sea.
You became the light on the dark side of me.
Love remained a drug that's the high and not the pill.

But did you know,
That when it snows,
My eyes become large and,
The light that you shine can be seen.

Baby, I compare you to a kiss from a rose on the grey.
Ooh, The more I get of you, Ooh
Stranger it feels, yeah.
And now that your rose is is in bloom.
A light hits the gloom on the grey.

There is so much a man can tell you,
So much he can say.
You remain,
My power, my pleasure, my pain, baby
To me you're like a growing addiction that I can't deny.. yeah.
Won't you tell me is that healthy, baby?

But did you know,
That when it snows,
My eyes become large and the light that you shine can be seen.

Baby, I compare you to a kiss from a rose on the grey.
Ooh, the more I get of you
Stranger it feels, yeah
Now that your rose is in bloom.
A light hits the gloom on the grey,

I've been kissed by a rose on the grey,
I've been kissed by a rose on the grey,
And if I should fall, at all
I've been kissed by a rose on the grey.

There is so much a man can tell you,
So much he can say.
You remain
My power, my pleasure, my pain.
To me you're like a growing addiction that I can't deny, yeah
Won't you tell me is that healthy, baby.

But did you know,
That when it snows,
My eyes become large and the light that you shine can be seen.

And now that your rose is in bloom
A light hits the gloom on the grey.

He dances around enough to give me some ideas how to interpret 'a' meaning. But no story here as I can see. The music (melody, chord, performance, the mix) - it's all good for me.

I wonder if Pat Pattison is able to like songs such as 'Little Wing' or songs where words are musical sounding in them selves.

If AW owners were aggressive, maybe they could see about getting him on the forum to answer some Q&A and give feedback on some of our lyrics - or maybe get Genevieve on the forum to share some expertise on the subject.