Saw my tall Texas drawling sexy ex the other day He said Hi, I said Hey, we didn’t have much to say He looked smug and mentioned he was seeing someone I thought, dust off your Nikes, girl, you’re gonna wanna run But then that’s just my negative gut reaction She’s suffering that unrelenting love attraction I know, I’s once in the throes of that same addiction But now he’s NMP –
Not my problem anymore; I sobered up and picked up My Victoria’s Secrets off the floor I was stoned on his pheromones, but I’m in recovery, and he’s NMP
Well, he likes to wine and dine in the finest place And you won’t mind the first time He gets that shocked look on his face When his wallet just isn’t there and he says Honey, got some money, got like a fifty to spare? Oh, yeh – the bartenders watch him at the Tip-A-Few Cause he’s ducked out on a tab or two They might come by and try to collect from you But not me – they know he’s NMP –
Not my problem anymore; the ‘mount in my bank account Was looking right poor Now I’m headed for financial respectability, since he’s NMP
Yeh, he’s a man of means by no means, and fortunately, he’s NMP
Now tell me how you lost that last job again How your delivery truck driving career met a bad end Dispatcher radioed she wanted to give you the "go ahead" And what the hell did you tell the Boss you coulda sworn she said? Sexual harassment is bad on your record, Could I stop by and testify you’re not such a peckerwood Yeh, once upon a time! But now I’m filing this little crime Under NMP
Not my problem any more; got a place for this cold case under been there and done that before I’m sealing this file, and I’m throwing out the key, cause he’s NMP Not my problem anymore; NMP, Changed the locks on all my drawers NMP, what I meant to say was doors, but irrespectively, he is NMP Not my problem any more
This is really unfair of me to say, but daggone girl- what have you got against men? I mean DAMN! Ever write a love song? You must've really had a bad experience with some guy that you just can't get past. In case you hadn't noticed, you're really down on the unfair sex!
Nice, fun song. I can hear a fast country beat in my head.
One critique, though . . . I would cut the last verse before the final chorus to this . . .
Now tell me how you lost that last job again How your delivery truck driving career met a bad end Dispatcher radioed she wanted to give you the "go ahead" And what the hell did you tell the Boss you coulda sworn she said?
I would leave out the following lines about sexual harrassment, because they're really not necessary; the implication is already there. Then you could use this section as a bridge before the final choruses. It would make a great counterpoint from the "facts" by using a "story" as a slightly different melody.
Nice work!
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Take Care . God Bless . Rock On . Zach . The TuneHead
Hi, again Artist Weekly world! Am digging out from under the mountains of projects I've had going on so am looking forward to checking out the new music.
Tunehead, thanks for your feedback and glad you got a li'l kick out of the song!
CA - Considering I've only sent four songs in and two of them have what could be interpretted as a sort of critical tone towards men (this one and "Finish"), I guess I can see how you'd make this remark - though, quite honestly, my intention in both is playful, pokin' fun. I do these songs a lot when I perform, and nobody seems to think they come across like I have something against men - but in performance, these are just two among a couple of dozen others so in that context are probably better "balanced" with lots of other topics and themes (including, yup, believe it or not LOVE SONGS !). Actually, the basis for both NMP and "Finish" was conversations I listened to over the course of several months' working with two women who had the most gawd awful history with men. They had these "top-this" stories they would tell to one-up each other ("Oh, yeh, you think that's bad, well I went out with this guy....etc.). Myself, I've been married to the same very fine guy so long, I can't remember life before marriage! Anyway, no personal bad feelings about men - just having fun with songs.
I used to love her, but I had to kill her (!), Guns & Roses
Should I go on?
A woman singing about a jerk of a guy is considered male-bashing, but Axel killing his girlfriend is all in good fun? I enjoyed your lyrics, Sharon, and it is good to see a strong woman who can stick it to the dudes.
Thanks for comments, BC - always glad to know someone got a li'l kick out of my lyrics!
Probably something like, what, 90% of the songs ever written are about male-female stuff; I just like to throw a different angle on it sometimes; gawd knows, some kind of different angles are needed ..... from time to time
AH HA ! I knew SOMEWHERE on this site, I had gotten some vaguely POSITIVE remarks on this song - I just had to dig around!
Now for the record, in case anybody's still actually here, I just wanted to add the news, that this song was very good to me recently.
For months, some of my singer-songwriter friends have been trying to talk me into going to the open auditions (held a couple/few times of year) at the Bluebird Cafe in Nashville. So last month when the auditions came around (Sunday 9/16), I took the plunge and went - flew into Nashville that morning, stood in line with about a hundred other people, did the ONE-MINUTE audition (right, not one SONG but one minute of a song; and did, yup this here one, N-M-P), hopped back on a plane, and got back home that evening.
A week later, I got the letter, congratulating me on passing the audition and inviting me to perform on Sunday April 20! It will be a three-song spotlight; I'll be one of 9 to 12 songwriters selected for the Sunday Writers' Night Show that Sunday.
From each open audition of around 90 - 100 performing songwriters, I was told that between 4 to 10 are invited to come back for a Sunday night spotlight, so I am pretty excited to be going. And if the 3-song show is well-received, I can schedule more shows without auditioning again.
I plan to stay a few days this time, to have a chance to look around a little - esp. since all I saw audition day were the airport, the shopping center parking lot where the Bluebird is located, LOTS of people carrying guitars around, and the inside of the Bluebird itself.
So if anybody (yoo-hoo, who's still out there....?) has any suggestions of stuff to see and do, please let me know - my email is available in my profile.
I did the BlueBird back in 1990ish. I had written some crap about my then exwife and couldn't think clear enough to realize my songs where ****. So I took off! Drove up there from Anniston Alabama, uphill, both ways!!!
Mount Eagle pass, between Chattanooga and Nashville, is(was) a bitch of a ride, sheer mountain walls, minimum distance from road side to over the hill side...and sand berm emergency vehicle stops all down the hill!
What a rush!
When I saw all those people, guitars in hand, and the reality that I was in Nashville where >everybody< wrote songs and that I couldn't fool them...man, that was the toughest day of that week!
Hey, Jack - thanks for the note; and thanks for sharing the story. I hope to do the drive vs. fly in April, take some time and see the scenery.
It was a wild experience - I figured, whatever happened, it was a learning experience I would never forget. There were all ages, all levels of talent, all music styles, all manner of dress - there were tall, craggy cowboys with the boots and big belt buckles; glam-girls looking like heading for Broadway;couple of young neuvo-hippie LA kids - even a South American guy in a fancy suit and patent leather shoes who did a beautiful latino kind of number. I was thinking, only in Music City would you see this crowd all in one place!
The letter said the next step is they'd see how the April show goes, and if it has good reception, call and schedule more appearances. Anyway, I'm pretty psyched, and thanks again!
!). Actually, the basis for both NMP and "Finish" was conversations I listened to over the course of several months' working with two women who had the most gawd awful history with men. They had these "top-this" stories they would tell to one-up each other ("Oh, yeh, you think that's bad, well I went out with this guy....etc.). Myself, I've been married to the same very fine guy so long, I can't remember life before marriage! Anyway, no personal bad feelings about men - just having fun with songs.
